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Are You Addicted to Something or Someone?

Hi Beautiful Being!


I didn't mean to talk about Astrology today, but the rumors about Mercury Retrograde proved right in April when my Macbook broke.

Two days ago, well past the retrograde, it was my iPhone. What, Apple, do you need more of my money? I wondered.

I soothed my phone dependency a while ago by buying a backup phone.

But seriously, how dependent or even addicted are we to technology these days? Significantly.


And we’re addicted to other things, activities, and people, too.

Does the child within still seek to meet unmet needs? 


My father used to gamble a lot, and so did my grandfather. I've always been fascinated by addictions. Why do people get addicted to toxic things or activities? Why do some people get caught up in the vicious cycle of feeding their bad habits, and some only try things out and move on if they don't work or moderate themselves if they do work?


I looked at my own possible addictions in the past and the present.

Peanut butter

Sex

Shopping

I used to think I could not live without coffee until I quit.

I used to think wine was my social crutch until I quit wine - not socializing. 

Peanut butter would have been best in bottomless jars so that I could spoon it into my mouth until infinity. But then I stopped buying it, and my cravings ceased.

The same went for casual sex once upon a time; heck, how could we even live without physical affection, right? 

Until I went celibate and suddenly didn't miss it. I substituted it with hugs, dancing, and self-pleasure.

I never had a porn addiction, but I sympathize with those who mistake what they see on the screen for real-life interactions. 


Eventually, we forget what we're missing when we quit. 

That's how the human body and mind works. 

The trick is to prepare for some discomfort, but it too shall pass. 

Quitting takes courage.


What happens if we reintroduce the once-addictive habit?

It depends on you, your resilience, self-love, and your ability to be forgiving.

Reintroducing something in a very controlled manner could make you more proud of yourself!!


I concluded that everything could be healthy in moderation. Think of gambling as taking risks in life - yes, it could be beneficial!

But not daily slot machines!

  • Using technology? For work and education - great! For social media and games - only sporadically.

  • How about organic, mold-tested peanuts once in a while? Not a problem. 

  • Alcohol? A sip won't hurt. (I'm still happily sober, though)

  • Sweets? One to three squares of dark chocolate every day is under control.

  • Porn? All Hollywood movies show you sex, so it might be more realistic to watch those. 

  • Sex or Love-making that you find satisfying on a soul level? Healthy every day.


Don’t deny to yourself what brings you joy, but think... does it really bring joy, or more issues, extra kilos, negative bank balance, or distorted view of the world? Mindfully observe why you do what you do.


I recommend books by Gillian Riley How to Stop Smoking and Stay Stopped for Good and Eating Less.

The latter one banished my frequent unhealthy food binging several years ago. 


Happy Children’s Day!


Love,


Pavlina


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